When Meme turned three, I was diagnosed with brain cancer.

“My mother was literally a drill sergeant. And my father was Olympic level karate. So between the two of them, there was always someone pushing me to be better. I grew up with this competitive thing inside me that always wanted to be the best. And that carried into adulthood. By the time Meme was born, I was working sixty hour weeks. She was born on a Tuesday, and I was back at work on Thursday. 

My husband did everything. I’d come home, give the baby a kiss, then shut the office door. I told myself that I needed to work a little harder—get a little more security-- then later on I could stop and enjoy life. But that time never came. Because each time I reached a goal, I’d increase it a little more. When Meme turned three, I was diagnosed with brain cancer. At the time they told me ten years. We’re on year six right now. All my scans are clear. 

The tumour is still there, but it’s not growing. Who knows what will happen. But I do know that without the cancer, my little girl would have grown up without me. I’d have been around, but not there. We’d never be sitting in this park right now. So I’ve come to believe that everything happens for a reason. I was never afraid of dying. Even in the beginning. But I was always terrified of leaving her. And that fear changed everything.”

“He hates when I tell this story. But he saw me for the first time in Home Depot, and he was way too afraid to talk to me. So he got my name from a friend and sent me a message on social media. We got pregnant one year after we met. Fabian did everything for the baby: every meal, every feeding, every bath. And you can absolutely tell. Their connection is undeniable. Just the way he looks at her. So much awe and love. The exact same way he looked at her on the day she was born. 

He has a James Earl Jones style of parenting. I’m always so high-pitched and chirpy, but he’s smooth and monotone and deep. In the weeks after my cancer diagnosis, I kept noticing that he’d sit in his car after pulling into the driveway. I’d hear the music turn off. But he’d take several minutes to come inside. So one day I walked out there and found him crying and praying. He was trying to get it all out so he could be strong when he came inside. 

I have girlfriends that question how their husbands feel about them. But I never do. Never have. Because he lets me know every day. He calls me every single lunch break. And he still looks at me the exact same way that he did when we walked down the aisle.”